I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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