what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
My vagina is very pro this idea
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
