he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Randomize