The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
