i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
