Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
