I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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