We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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