she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
