You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
