let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
