note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
How's work?
Spinning.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
