They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
