there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
