Small penises have feelings too.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
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