What a fucking waste of an outfit
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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