I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
