I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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