We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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