No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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