I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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