Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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