We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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