Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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