bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
He had one of those small greek statue penises
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
