One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
