I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
