omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
