it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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