dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
