The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
