seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
