You just made me feel so damn special
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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