Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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