it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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