And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize