I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
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