Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
