UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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