mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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