Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
