I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
