There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
