I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
