I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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