check it out our google latitudes are spooning
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
