What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
