Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize