Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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