Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
