You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Duck Duck Cougar?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
