I cockslap morals
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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